Last night, after I got home from my work christmas party, and had gotten sufficiently dressed down and warm, fully content to stay in for the evening, my wife decided it was at that precise moment that she wanted to go to the store to get the self-wringing mop she’d had her eye on for a few days. Fine. I bundled back up, followed her to the car and we left, headed towards the mop store and ultimate peace of mind. Of course we couldn’t go to the Wal-Mart just five minutes away from our house because she’d checked there yesterday and they were completely out of the mop we needed, so we turned right onto the darkened interstate and made our way toward Germantown Parkway. As we looped around on the exit, my wife asked if it would be okay to stop by Michaels, probably my least favorite store in the world, and perpetually smells like a headache waiting to happen. I said sure, figuring that a craft store would be closed after nine o’clock on a Tuesday, but I was wrong, stupid holiday hours.
My wife has been on a kick lately about wanting to make her own candles, which would be totally awesome given the fact that some of my favorite smells aren’t traditionally found on the candle aisle. How come coffee, one of the most amazing smells in the world, can’t be found in a candle store? By the way I’m not talking about salted caramel latte that you are sure to find right next to gingerbread mocha, but just regular ol’ traditional coffee. So, for the second time in as many weeks I find myself in the candle making aisle at the worst store in the world, while my wife looks at all the components needed to make a candle, which she did last week and determined it would cost too much and wouldn’t be worth it, but something must have changed because here we were again. We left Michael’s empty-handed, our mission now to find a candle, and I was sure Barnes&Noble had candles, or maybe I just wanted to look at books, but regardless of my motives we drove across the street to the bookstore. They did have candles, but there were only like three varieties that all smelled like holiday headaches, so we decided to move on but not before I perused the store for a few minutes, looking for my next great read.
We were giving up, leaving the bookstore and going to Wal-mart where we would get a candle along with the mop which was the initial motivator for our nighttime excursion in the first place. As we made our way through the parking lot, past the mall, we realized that it was still open and we could get a good candle after all, at Bath & Body Works. We parked around back, closest to the store, and with thirty minutes until closing made our way into the Wolfchase Galleria, in search of a nasal treat. My wife was intent on peppermint and I was intent on smelling as many candles as I could get my nose near, searching desperately for the smell that would hang around our living room for the next month or so. They were out of the candy cane twist or something to that effect, which was their only peppermint scented candle, and we settled on a scent that we both loved, eucalyptus mint, the only problem being that it was a small candle and we wanted a larger candle, you know so we could pay more money for the same smell. I asked an employee if there was a bigger eucalyptus mint candle and she kindly pointed to the other side of the store, but before I could head that way she quickly grabbed another candle and tried to convince us that it was much better than eucalyptus mint, thrusting the winter themed candle towards my face and begging me to take a whiff. My wife and I both oversold how much we liked it, given the fact that it didn’t smell like much of anything at all, so we told her that we’d definitely think about it. We walked away and straight over to the big candle that we knew we wanted, paid, and left, pausing briefly as the sales associate badgered us about which candle we’d picked, and pretended to look crestfallen at the fact that we’d snubbed her more expensive recommendation in favor of a scent that we actually liked.
We left the mall at closing time and went to Wal-mart to get the mop, unfortunately they were out of the one my wife wanted too, so she just picked another brand and we were out of there in less than half an hour. All in all it only took us about two hours to get the mop that we’d set out to get, but in the process we gained a new candle, which would surely make our lives more serene. I went to bed last night with a headache. Thanks eucalyptus mint.