Three to Six Months

For the past few days I’ve had this persisting headache, but it has been unlike any others that I’ve ever experienced. This one moves about my head throughout the day in a horseshoe pattern, more of an annoyance than a pain. I think I might be dying, but then again, aren’t we all? What I mean is I’m fairly certain the end of my life is fast approaching, as no amount of sleep or Aleve does anything to pacify the constant pain in my head. Whereas almost all of my headaches in the past have been internal, this one feels like a physical pain, as if at some point over the last few days my head was knocked against the side of a brick wall, but as of now, I remember nothing of the sort. So once Web MD diagnosed me with a cranial cancer, please don’t be sad, it’s not what I would have wanted, I’ve been thinking about what to do with my last three to six months that I have here on earth, and here’s what I’ve come up with.

Obviously it goes without saying that it’s time for me to quit my job. What use is there wasting my time at work everyday when I’ve only got a very small window of opportunity left to live within? Under normal circumstances work can seem soul sucking, but now that I know the end is near, it would seem unbearable to sit there for eight hours a day, smiling at the customers and pretending to care about their granddaughter’s upcoming violin recital. So once I don’t have work tying me down I think I would want to fill my remaining days with travel, because throughout the course of my life, that is the one thing that has brought me the most joy, so I suppose it would be the perfect ending. The part I’m having trouble with is deciding on whether to go back and visit places I’ve been before, or travel to new and exciting destinations, lands of the unknown.

I guess those two options don’t have to be exclusive of one another. Perhaps I can revisit the places I love, and also venture to the places I most want to go. I’m the one dying, so I can make the rules. Paris, I love Paris. Nothing fills my heart like a morning in the heart of France, walking along cobbled streets in the warmth of the early sunlight, the sounds of angry drivers honking at me to get out of the street. This will be my first stop. From here I will go to the beaches of Spain, then onto the beaches of Greece. I’m sure these countries have much more to offer than their coastlines, but in case you missed it, I won’t be around much longer so I don’t have time to dilly-dally my way through the middle of the country. I was just about to buy my plane tickets for Paris, but as it turns out, I can’t afford them, and apparently there’s not a make-a-wish foundation for adults. I guess my dreams will be put on hold, at least for the time being, until I can earn enough money at work for my travels, but unfortunately by then, I’m likely to be dead.

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