My morning started off really weird today. First, I woke up from a really bad dream. I was leaving my apartment to go to work, when two police officers came striding towards me, all business, no smiles, and proceeded to tell me that a car had been stolen from the parking lot, and that they had a warrant to search every single apartment, and since legally I couldn’t refuse them, I walked them up the stairs and let them into my home. I offered to go in first and to put the dogs in their kennel, because although small, one of the chihuahuas has a tendency to bite the ankles of unknown people, but the officers said that wouldn’t be necessary and I got the distinct feeling that they suspected if I went in alone that I would try to hide the evidence that implicated me in the grand theft auto charge that was waiting to be filled by the guilty party, which obviously wasn’t me, but of course, having just met me, they didn’t know that I wasn’t the type of person who would steal a car, so they had to treat me the same as everyone else, like a prime suspect in the investigation.
They walked into the apartment, and predictably, the dogs started yapping, but instead of kicking them to the side or give them a whack across the head with a nightstick, one of the police officers, the gentler of the two, picked a dog up in each arm and carried them around with him for the entirety of the search. They kept asking me questions that seemed irrelevant as they scoured every inch of my home, like how many electrical outlets were behind my bed. “Seven, but only two work.” Every answer from me got a suspicious look from them, like I was just confirming again and again why I was the most likely suspect to have stolen the car. I couldn’t take the mundane questioning anymore, so I went outside to get some fresh air and wait for them to finish their pointless investigation of me. I stood pacing for a few minutes, nervous with each passing minute that they were finding something that seemed to solidify the case in their mind, or maybe more likely they were planting evidence, to frame me and close the case. Finally they walked out of my apartment, down the stairs and directly past me, the shorter, burlier, of the two officers hit me hard with his shoulder as he walked past, an intimidation tactic no doubt, but they didn’t pull out the handcuffs, or say anything to me for that matter, so apparently I was free to go about my day.
I went back to the apartment to lock up before heading into work, and what I found inside, was haunting. My two little Chihuahuas were nowhere to be found, but along the hall lying on the ground were three German Shepherds, all with matted hair and labored breathing, wheezes coming out visibly in puffs of smoke, polluting the air in the apartment that hung like a dense and putrid fog. Their heads raised all at once, like they sensed my presence entering the door, and that is when they took off running, tearing through the apartment, down the hall and back, with no destination in mind. The third of the dogs, was dressed in a skeleton costume, its head the only thing that looked normal on it. I didn’t know what was happening, if it was some sort of ritual or they were trying to tell me something, but it was just too much to take in at the moment, plus I needed to get to work, so I locked the door and left the strange dogs in my house, and started on my way to work.
Somewhere along the way, my car caught on fire, like completely engulfed in flames, and try as I might, I couldn’t open the door, so there was nothing I could do but to scream and wait to die. I woke up before the actual death, so that’s a good sign as far as dreams go, but on my way to work this morning, I could smell gas for a big chunk of my drive, so I’m slightly concerned that my dream was a premonition of things to come, but I guess I’ll just have to keep on living to find out. I’ll let you know how it goes, or else you can read my story in the paper, it will be the one next to the picture of the burning car.